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The Yes Brain: How to Cultivate Courage, Curiosity, and Resilience in Your Child
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 5 hours and 56 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Random House Audio
Audible.com Release Date: January 9, 2018
Language: English, English
ASIN: B078P4RT1C
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
As the mother of a 13 year old, I was delighted to have an opportunity to read this book. Who wouldn't want to foster courage, curiosity, and resilience in her child? The book did not disappoint. It is well-written, insightful, and very easy to read. The authors provide plenty of anecdotal examples based on experiences with their clients, and is full of entertaining, relatable cartoon drawings depicting various scenarios.Much of the advice seems to be tailored at dealing with younger children (elementary school age), but the guidance applies to older children as well. The authors remind us that a child's brain is not yet fully formed, so he is, at times, incapable of controlling his emotions or responses to situations. When a child acts or responds in a certain way, rather than criticizing and condemning the behavior, we should seek to understand it, and help the child learn how to cope better to perhaps respond differently in the future. The focus is on empathetic parenting and is a reminder for the need to be patient when parenting.The authors discuss three "zones" -- a red zone, full of rage and anger and frustration; a blue zone, which is detached and checked out; and a green zone -- the good place to be. They talk about figuring out your child's tolerance for conflict and steps you can take to broaden the green zone, or help your child move back into the green zone when they are angry or scared.To promote resilience, the authors recommend that you shower your children with the four S's -- make them feel safe, seen, soothed, and secure. You want to create a safe environment where they can try new things, express concerns without negative repercussions, responding to their anger with calmness and understanding rather than being angry because they are angry. It's hard. It's really hard. Young teenagers especially can say some pretty mean things toward their parents -- but I'll just keep reminding myself that the teenaged brain is not yet fully developed.As the authors point out, people who are caring and empathetic are generally less frustrated, less angry, less judgmental --- and no doubt happier in life. The book gives guidance on how to help nurture your child's ability to react with empathy to others. By encouraging and children to be empathetic using the language and guidance provide, we can actually help rewire our children's brains. There's a lot here about neuroplasticity and the ability to change how we're wired. It sounds promising --All of this is easier said than done. I was pumped up with all sorts of ideas on how to promote positivity after reading this delightful book. But reading a book is no guarantee of successful implementation of the techniques therein -- and that is easier said than done. I'm working on it.
I have read Whole Brain Child, No Drama Discipline and Parenting from the Insight Out. The Yes Brain expands on those books, but even more exciting has sections for us as parents to reflect on ourselves. I really love the exercises and cartoons, which engage my 4 year old. Definitely worth the read to help build resilience and courage! Easy to see where I can improve on seeing, hearing and being there for my kid, and nuture their inner spark. (And while working our way thru tantrums).
I won't bother with the book details, they're well covered in other reviews, so I'll just say that I really can't recommend these enough.Long story short, "The Whole Brain Child" and it's two companion books by the same authors, "No Drama Discipline", and more recently "The Yes Brain" really have been the most useful parenting books I've encountered. (they are loosely coupled, so you can read any of them individually, in any order)Of the 40 or so books (and zillion articles, studies, etc.) I gobbled up when we first found out we'd be expecting, these are the ones that really stand out, and that I can most hold up and say "I'm a better parent today than I otherwise would be, because I read this."These aren't read-once books for me - I still flip through them once in a while, as a refresher, three years later, and will probably continue to revisit them well into the future.I also make it a habit to gift hardcover copies of all three books to anyone we know who's expecting, along with an offer to buy them the e-book versions instead, if they'd rather have those.Even the best parents have room for improvement, and I can't really imagine anyone reading any of these without finding something that will add to their parenting skills.Bottom line, if you believe parenting is a skill to be honed, if you want to parent thoughtfully and intentionally rather than just echoing your own parents methods (which may have been just fine), if you want your parenting to be in tune with the facts and empirical evidence provided by modern psychology and brain-science (which has improved greatly over the last 20 years or so), and if you want a better understanding of how your child's mind works, how you can best guide that mind for long-term success, then please don't miss these books.What else can I say? Seriously, just buy the book - buy all three, if you can.Your kids will probably never thank you for reading them, but they should =o)
I'm a huge Fan Siegel fan and this book just is not on the same level as his other stuff. It constantly paraphrased and mentioned his other books. I bought this for original content, not as a review of his previous content. The tips are good and he is one of my favorite parenting experts. I just wish there was newer, more original content.
I really found this useful. I wish I had gotten it in print as I would have tabbed it. Also, the cartoons are difficult to read in the Kindle version. I do want to go back and show them to my son (they have chapter summaries to share with your kids). The red/green/blue zone idea was key to breaking through a barrier I was facing with my son. I plan to read their other books and I hope they are as good as this one is.
The books of Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson are some of the most helpful, liberating, and enlightening books on my parenting shelf, and THE YES BRAIN is no exception. With helpful examples from their therapy careers and their experience raising kids, Siegel and Bryson equip parents with specific techniques and practices guaranteed to strengthen their relationships with their children and, at the same time, better understand how to raise kids to become who they were made to be. Empowering, helpful, life-changing.
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